IT'S MY CHOICE TO NOT SUPPORT 'MY CHOICE'.

MY CHOICE; this video, directed by Homi Adajania has literally gone viral for all the wrong reasons! If you haven’t watched it yet, here’s the link. Watch it, and then read the post.
(Link: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KtPv7IEhWRA) 

I didn’t post a status on Facebook, or tweet on Twitter, or blog about it. Basically, I did nothing. ‘Why?’ you ask? I believe in silence till I can reach a conclusion. And before I do, I like to go through all the possibilities of what something can or cannot mean. And now that I have reached a conclusion, I am ‘obviously’ going to blog about it- my choice. 

First of all, I was shocked that Vogue India did not think of the consequences it would cause to their #VogueEmpower campaign before releasing this video. I mean, I honestly loved the video directed by Vikas Bahl featuring Alia Bhatt, called ‘Going Home’. It was cute, it was simple, but it was really powerful when it came to sending out a message, and the best part? Its message was extremely clear. But what happened to ‘My Choice’? Looks like Vogue India went wrong with its choice.

As Vogue India Itself mentioned in the description of the video- what happens when 99 women from varying walks of life come together to send out one powerful message? I’ll tell you what happens. The whole society goes gaga over it because the message 99 women are giving out- 99, that’s a lot- is completely wrong. And what’s worse? That the wrong message you’re giving out is actually powerful. Destruction⁹⁹, that’s what it is.

When I began watching the video, I didn’t quite realise what was happening. I’m not stupid, but the video is very vivid and doesn’t really make a lot of sense. It looked like these women had something extremely major against the society, and it seemed very aggressive. Nevertheless, I continued watching and realization began to dawn upon me. Feminism; that’s the whole deal out here! Pretty cool; so I continued watching.

Then, this happened.

“To have sex before marriage”, yeah okay, no one has issues with that, it IS your choice. “To have sex outside of marriage; my choice” wait, what? Excuse me, did I hear that right? Outside of marriage; really, that’s your ‘choice’?

No it’s not. Neither is it a privilege. Promoting feminism, gender equality- that’s one thing; promoting adultery- now that’s a different thing. Whether you are a male or a female, adultery does not come off as a 'choice' in the first place.

Honestly, nature has created women physically weak and emotionally stronger than men, and the vice versa. If we’re expecting men to give birth to babies; women to lift 100s of KGS in a construction site- that’s not gender equality. GENDER EQUALITY COMES WITH ACCEPTANCE. Accept the opposite gender as they are, and you shall already be equal to them.

Yes, I agree, that not just in India, but throughout the world, there is an air of male dominance and it cannot be wiped off in a day, but, female dominance isn’t an option. Equality is; dominance isn’t. Honestly, I saw a lot of my own friends sharing that video and promoting the so called equality, but think about it. If a man came up you and told you that “sex outside of marriage is his choice”, would you make a video of it and share it on YouTube, calling it a powerful message? Or would you take those slippers off and smack him on the head with it? I think we’d choose Option 2. Now, if a man isn’t allowed to do this, and is looked down by the society, then can a woman be given this choice? I found this video that supports this article. 

Do watch it: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VhjOnXGXpHo&amp, it’s much more ‘powerful’ than the original video itself.

In closing, I would like to say that this video definitely did not turn out to be empowering or unbiased. In turn, it was aggressive, unclear, biased… to sum it all up in one sentence, all this video did manage to tell was this: “I am awesome, boys you suck; get lost!” and has definitely hurt the male populace of the country. Sincere apologies from every female; we love you. Remember, your gender does not matter, but your choices do. your choices affect others lives as much as they affect yours, and the effect might be terrible if you take the wrong choices. if you want others to take your decisions, your choices seriously, then be true to yourself about what you want first. Vogue India has been coming up with really touching campaigns, but after 'My Choice', they need to compensate the loss by putting forward simpler and clearer content for the audience. Good luck Team Vogue; stay true to your name!  

SHOULD PROSTITUTION BE MADE COMPLETELY LEGAL IN INDIA, OR SHOULD IT REMAIN WITH LIMITED LEGALITY?

So, I was just going through few articles and statistics, to keep myself from getting bored in the library, and I came across the term ‘Prostitution’, and the biggest question that followed, ‘Should prostitution be made legal in India?’

Before reading this article, you should know that yes, prostitution is legal in India, but the definition is limited to the exchange of money for sex, and does not include pimping, brothel-keeping and soliciting sex in any other way. In other words, prostitution has limited legality in India.

Firstly, for anyone new to this term, prostitution is the practice or occupation of engaging in sexual activity with someone for payment. This is the definition you’ll find on Google. This is probably the only definition you’ll find anywhere. There has been a huge never-ending argument if this profession (point to be noted: it isn't considered a profession in the first place by many in this country) should be made completely legal or not. Even if it is legal, should it be regulated? Should the law be amended where complete liberty is given to the prostitutes? Should it be made illegal again? There are countries where prostitution is completely legal, few of them are Singapore, Argentina, Belgium, New Zealand, UK and Venezuela. In Afghanistan, Cambodia, Angola, Egypt, Iraq, South Africa, Saudi Arabia, UAE and a few other countries, prostitution is illegal. And then, there are few countries similar to India, like Bangladesh, United States, Australia, Iceland and Malaysia, where the laws show limited legality. 

Few argue that it should be made completely legal. When asked why, the answers held reasons like these; 

1. Prostitution has been around since the beginning of mankind. Most anti-prostitution laws were passed over a 100 years ago. It happens every day throughout the world, so why not make money off it and reduce the risk in it? It is simply two consenting adults exchanging a service for money. It should be as legal as a plumber’s profession or as that of a maid. Also like plumbers, sex workers could also form work unions to gain more rights.
2. The number of rapes would decrease, as desperation would find an outlet.
3. STD's are usually contracted from a non-prostitute, because prostitutes keep themselves in check. So, STD’s would decrease.
4. The fight against human trafficking can be fought in a better way, because people’s legal consent would be obtained without fear. (What?) 
5. It could be taxed and the government could benefit out of it. Not exactly a profit for the client, but still, a profit on the whole.
6. Sex is good for your health and it is scientifically proven. If more people in India have sex, maybe we'd be a little less of an obese country and it may lower heart disease. (Of course!)
7. More jobs, which would reduce unemployment. 
8. If abortion is legal, why not prostitution? We always hear the argument "It's my body..." right? Why doesn't it apply to this subject?
9. People are doing it regardless of what the law says. Drugs can have a negative effect on a person, but prostitution has very few minor downsides, so what’s the harm?
10. There would be less crimes regarding sex.
11. The government would not only be able to make money of taxed prostitution, but save on various places where they have to invest, like the police, the prison, etc. It’s beneficial for the country. 
12. If the woman is encouraged to use her mind and make a living, why can’t she be allowed to use her body?

Few, on the other hand, were against prostitution being made legal and wanted the status to change. Reasons are as follows:

1. There is a huge risk that a person might get affected by HIV/AIDS.
2. There are other ways to make a living. There are so many other jobs, then why this?
3. Women have other choices, but it is cheap to find an easy way out.
4. It is wrong to women to sell their bodies, because it is disrespectful.
5. It makes the men look like they are the dominant sector of the society and use women. (Aren't there male prostitutes too?)
6. Real men don’t buy women.
7. As a prostitute get’s older, you really think she’ll be able to continue as a prostitute? What will she do for a living then?
8. High risk of dying.
9. Men can rape these prostitutes, but find an easy way out by stating that it is legal.
10. There are not only women who are prostitutes; there are also children who are prostitutes, who have been forced into this profession. How fair is that?
11. It affects the moral status of the society.
12. The prostitutes might turn into drug addicts and alcoholics or support these illegal activities.
13. Health related issues will emerge, and respect in the society will founder.
14. Prostitutes might not find other jobs, and they would also have no one who could take care of them, causing emotional and psychological damage, depression and loneliness.
15. Have sex, but not on the streets or in a strangers car. Keep it classy and less trashy. It’s called making love for a reason.

After the survey, I decided not to take sides when writing about this issue, but to ask a simple yet complicated question to you readers, “What is your opinion about this issue?” 

(Please comment below.)

TRUST ME; I'M LYING.

"Whoever controls the media controls the mind." - Jim Morrison

One of the biggest challenges faced by the society today is controlling their own mind. How often do we see a person with an original opinion? How often do we value a person’s opinion? Be it something as major as wanting a particular prime minister, to something as trivial as choosing a movie to watch, we blindly follow what the media says; rarely questioning it. Being a media student myself, I still come under its influence. No, I’m not trying to say “Lady Gaga wants to control our minds”. That is not the case. She is simply a small part of the huge system that is the mass media.


Mass media are media forms designed to simply reach the largest audience possible. They include TV, movies, radio, newspapers, magazines, books, records, video games, and the internet; basically everything under the sun. We don’t see such a large network of communication owned by the common man. It’s for the common man, by the elite. Confused? Let me break it down for you. When Reliance (owned by Mukesh Ambani, one of the richest men in India- elite, didn’t I tell you?) took over Network 18, which owns CNN IBN-one of the best news channels in India- nobody was surprised to know that it was the death of Media Independence. Following the takeover, was a massive drop in the information provided to us on the negative side of Reliance Industries Ltd. And when we do not see (or not allowed to see) the negative aspect of a situation, we blindly believe that the subject in the situation came straight out of the Bible. Does this mean that our independence to think freely and have our own opinion is under danger? One word, yes. Your brain is dead meat.
My point is that an ignorant population does not know its rights, does not seek a greater understanding of issues and does not question authorities. It simply follows trends. It simply follows the media. Popular culture nurtures this ignorance by continually serving them some brain-numbing entertainment. Some feed them by spotlighting degenerate celebrities to be idolized. I’m not saying media’s influence is always bad. My point is that the extent to which you let it influence you is bad. If you ask me, “Is there a way to stop this?”  Yes, there is.
STOP BUYING THEIR CRAP AND MAKE YOUR OWN DECISIONS.

True, that media just influences us and our decisions are our own, but what if you’re influenced to such an extent that you believe there are no choices? Let me give you few examples from different sectors.

1. When we elected for Mr.  Narendra Modi, as Prime Minister, (Oh please, you and I both know we didn’t vote for BJP, we voted for Modi) how many of them truly weighed pros and cons that would follow, and how many of them went with the herd? Around 65-70% of India’s population would fall under the second category. Modi, with his excellent PR and Advertising agencies, wiped out the thought from our minds that other candidates existed too. Remember the famous slogan, “Abki baar Modi sarkar”? Remember how memes and statuses emerged up in thousands of numbers and everybody was sharing it? Yes, it seems funny now, but go back in time and think about it. If it wasn’t for the media’s influence, would you really be campaigning? In fact, half of them didn’t even know that in the process of posting a status as a joke, they were indirectly campaigning for him.

2. Justin Beiber. How many of you hate him? Woah, that’s a large number! Okay, hands down. I’m not a fan myself, but why do you hate him? If you have a genuine reason, then you’re excused, but if you don’t, then whose influence are you under? The media.  Half the people don’t even know why they hate him. They haven’t heard his songs, they haven’t seen the videos, neither have they seen him making out with a guy. But no, they choose to look beyond the obvious and hate him.

3. Ever got a shampoo with some hope to have hair like Katrina Kaif? Finished the disgusting packs of Kellogg’s K to get a figure like Deepika Padukone? Even flaunted a style like Tom Cruise from one of movies, or tried talking like Benedict Cumberbatch from Sherlock Holmes? What are you really doing there? If it weren’t for those serials and advertisements, which product would you choose? Whose style would you copy? The media packed these products like little Christmas presents and kept them there, and man, were you fast in grabbing the presents or what!

4. Finally, the social media! We live in a generation where a life without Facebook, WhatsApp, and YouTube isn’t considered a 'life' in the first place. “Dude, what’s your Facebook ID?” “Uh man, I don’t have one!” “What!? Dude, get a life!” We don’t notice how we keep going back to our pages, like how I keep coming back to this blog, we keep checking for notifications, and we let online game rule our world. Of-course, we live in an era where social media is necessary to show our existence on earth. But at times- influenced by media- we fantasize about our life so much, that we lose perspective of it.

“If a nation expects to be ignorant and free, it expects what never was and never will be.”

– Thomas Jefferson

GREAT INDIAN RESERVATION: UNITING PEOPLE BY DIVIDING THEM SINCE 1950

“Breathe in, breathe out. Calm down. I’m sure you’ll get into a good university!”

It was the second round of CET counseling. I was just reassuring him to get his mind off reality.

“Yeah, easy for you to say that now, considering that you already got into one.  Where is this amazingly good university that I’m going to get into? Please tell me Abhi, I’m waiting.” (Sarcasm overload)

“Trust me, okay? We’ll figure something out. I’m sure you’ll get into a good one.”

“Yeah, once I’m done shooting everybody who has a reservation, my turn will come. That I’m sure of!”

All I could do was blankly stare at the message.

So, this was during the sunny April and May of 2014 that my batch of 12^th graders appeared and tested their luck in the entrance exams. It’s amazing how nobody cares if they are lucky enough to get decent marks to crack these entrance exams anymore. What matters is if you are lucky enough to be born under the right caste. Yes my folks, we are talking about the ‘Great Indian Reservation: Uniting people by dividing them since 1950’

After what seemed like a very long wait, the aspirant engineers and doctors finally received a token of love from the universities, in the form of ‘CET’ and ‘AI Rankings’. I remember this one incident very clearly because nobody had seen it coming! A friend of mine gave her IIT entrance tests, and she did not get in. She was one of the smartest people I had known in my life! Apparently, there were around 10,000 people smarter than her (not to make it very obvious, let’s say her ranking was 13,000). In the same class, was another student, smart; not smart enough though, who appeared in the same exam. His ranking was 19,000. Today, he studies in IIT Madras. If “Oh, wait, what just happened?” was the thought that flashed into your mind, then don’t be surprised, this isn't the case of one or two people, but thousands in this country. Isn't it evident when people from general category cannot make it to their dream college or job, but they see their ‘very good’ friend sitting right there, happy, even with lower grades, or job experience? Oops! No longer a very good friend!

Welcome to India.

The caste system isn't something new in India. It has been there ever since Aryans set their foot on this side of the continent, and that was around 1500 BC; a long time ago. But out of everything history has contributed in enhancing our rich culture (which includes the Vedas, the Puranas, the amazing town planning from Indus Valley, which we desperately need today!) caste system is the only ‘contribution’ that has dug its roots deep into our soil, like a weed that just can’t be plucked out. Every year, hundreds of seats get reserved for SC, ST and OBCs, which I agree isn't a bad thing. What really bothers me about this entire set up is the fact that even though the majority of the people in India belong to general category, the numbers of seats are just not enough. Let’s take a very small example. What if a student who has scored 68% and has an AI ranking of 19,000 comes from an extremely rich family which can afford any college in the country, manages to get a seat (free of cost at times) because he has a reservation, but a Brahmin boy living next door with limited means, who has scored 90% and has an AI ranking of 9,000, doesn't get a seat, because hey, it’s the problem with the caste he was born to (a factor that he clearly can’t control), isn't it fair? No, it isn't fair.

What seemed like a boon once, to be born to a higher caste, seems like a bane now. How is it logical for the government to promote equality by dividing us? If the backward sectors of the society have to be treated equally, then why not treat every category as the general category? When did the definition of ‘equality’ change to ‘favoring the select few”?

The government needs to amend its laws as the times change, because the mentality of the society changes with every generation that adds up, or goes extinct. Reservation should be given based on the economic background of a person, that the caste he was born to. Knowing that India has a huge sector of the population below poverty line, it might seem impossible for this to happen, but doesn't it seem logical that a person is valued and judged based completely on his knowledge and ability than the caste which he was born into, which isn't even in his hands?

To throw more light on the fact that reservation doesn't show its glory only over the education system (even if my article hovers over it), but also over other fields, here are some statistics that might help us understand this better.

Public sector jobs are divided into 4 categories: Group I (or A), II (or B), III (or C) and IV (or D). In 1959, out of all the people who took up jobs in the public sector, approximately 1% were SC in group A jobs, around 2% in group B, 9% in group C and 17% in group D. Explicitly, very less number of high profile jobs were taken up by SC and their proportion increased with jobs that require lesser qualification or skill. With reservation tightening its grip over the Indian society, the numbers mentioned above rose to 10%, 12%, 16% and 21% till 1995. Clearly, this was a positive change, a change towards equality in terms of caste. But do we still live 1959? Are our thoughts still on the same path as in was in 1959? The answer is clear, no. Today, with reservations dominating the country, general category faces the threat of unemployment or poor education, not because they are not skilled enough, but because their skills don’t matter.

Reservation wasn't a bad idea, after all, looking at the above data, but the way reservation is being implemented now is terribly wrong. Do we need to reserve seats in an organization which already has limited seats, where people without reservation have to suffer? Can’t our government simply increase the number of seats or colleges which provide admission to all sectors based on merit? Can’t the reservation be implemented based on the economic background of an individual? Who is truly benefiting from such a system? Clearly, no one.

Reservation in itself is a way to enhance caste inequality in India. Filled with irony to the brim, it focuses on eradicating caste system by implementing it indirectly, poisoning the minds of kids born in this generation who can look beyond caste, creed, and gender. We have spent enough time concentrating on the pleas of the reserved class of the society, isn't it time to take action before general category becomes the new “reserved”? Just something to think about.

THE KISS OF ACCEPTANCE

PDA is not a crime. It's high time we accept it.

I am a South Indian.

No, that is not how I introduce myself to others. That is what the people around me take into consideration, just a second or two before they judge me. “Traditional/Conservative/Madrasi/an alien!” Or the most frequent statement, “You can’t be a Southie, you’re fair!” (Like, what?) And I don’t deny their judgement, partly because it is a wee bit true. Mostly, because I study in a university situated in South India, but filled to the brim with North Indians. One basic “college” survival skill is to ‘never go against the majority’! Coming from a South Indian family, not a very conservative one, but not very liberal either, it was a culture shock when I first decided to take a walk in the campus- my first day alone in the university. Why? I had never ‘ever’ in my entire life, seen a couple stand and kiss on the road. Not that I hadn't seen a couple kiss before (I had to drag my friend a million times from the basement of our school, interrupting the holy exchange of saliva with her boyfriend, because we were getting late for math class), but in public? Whoa. No friggin way! With my bad eyesight, and my temporarily ‘out of service’ brain, I took some time to realize what was happening, and turned away to look at something else. Anything else! My pace increased. I walked away and found myself in another road. The next thing I knew, I had called up three of my friends back home, in a span of 10 minutes, and burst out- like a motor mouth- about what I’d just seen. Oh believe me; I do not come from the 1990’s version of India. I’m talking about the society today.

What I noticed after I stepped into this university is that society changes from place to place. Back home, I studied in the same school for 14 years. I went in the same van to school for 14 years, played with the same people and shared food with the same ‘forever hungry’ group of friends. Went to the same places, and came back to my home, which is located in the same place for 15 years now. Nothing around me changed, except the size of my clothes, shoes, and a few oldies near my home that passed away. Yup, they died. The way my parents treated me changed slightly- maybe, but not much. And the neighborhood I stayed in, oh my god, it was probably one of the most conservative areas in Bangalore. Just because the non conservative kids had exported themselves to other countries and their conservative parents from the 50’s had stayed back, now retired, with a pet or two, scolding every kid who even uttered the word “play” on the road. Forget about kissing on the road, we maintained a fair but not very obvious distance from the opposite gender when they were around; sometimes even when they weren't around. Now let me make this very clear, not all parts of Bangalore are like that. The neighboring locality itself isn't like mine. Of course, we all have our share of childhood crushes, relationships, holding hands, first kisses (not me), a lot of kisses that followed (still not me), broken hearts and a lot more. But one thing that refused to happen in public was the kissing, the affection, the “PDA” basically. Public display of Affection.

As I finished my high school, my long summer- packing things, my goodbyes to a lot of people, I finally ended up in college, and all of a sudden, I was kicked out from a timid, conservative society to a ‘bang on, young and energetic, youthful’ society! Students, students everywhere! The humans above the age of 30 in this town either work for a bank (which serves the students) or as a faculty member in the university. That young a town it is. Let me be very frank. Eventually, I felt very awkward looking at a couple kissing in public. They were there everywhere! Maybe if I grew up in an environment like that, I would've been used to it, but I wasn't, and I didn't know what to do, except ogle at them like a retarded idiot. Once a person steps into college, they obviously want to experiment with everything that was denied to them before. It’s a fact. And that’s how I ended up in a club. A shady club. Being the only sober kid in the group, I sat back and started to look around and observe people with whatever amount of light was available there. The same thing happened again; showers of kisses. Couples, drunk kids, random kids, everybody. That is when I realized, I had to change. My views had to change, because the world wouldn't stop for me. The time zone I lived in wouldn't freeze for me, and with the generation moving forward, with every new step towards the future, only I could help myself by accepting this and moving on. The next day, I saw a couple making out. I didn't feel a thing. Nothing. It was almost as if I had seen it so many times, like seeing flowers grow on the footpaths, like seeing leaves on trees, like seeing something as ordinary as that.

Often, we don’t consider such actions common or normal in our society. We have the police barging into every rally, every protest and every campaign that supports PDA. We have the conservative class looking down upon PDA. But what is wrong in showing love and affection to a person? If we can fight in public, if we can show wars and its effects on television, broadcast it to the world, why can’t the Indian society accept peace, love and affection? If I could change my views, I am sure anybody else can too. By seeing PDA, one may get disgusted for a day or two, maybe a week. But after that, it just becomes a part of his daily life. I came across this beautiful quote, “Normal does not exist. What may seem normal to a spider, may be destructive to a fly”, and that explains the current situation and the mindset of our conservative society. What may seem normal to them, may be suffocating to the present generation, who dwell on freedom, liberty and openness. Yes, I agree, few thing think it is against our culture, but hey, aren't we the people who belong to the land in which there were people who carved out those beautiful sculptures in the Khajuraho temple? Sculptures, that were carved not a decade or two ago, but around 950 to 1050 AD. Now that, my folks, is a very long time ago. If PDA wasn't seen as an offense that time, by our own culture, why now? Not only in the south, which is considered to be 'conservative', but the north too. Why, in this country, is it considered an offence? 

We can only hope that this small whisper reaches them, and maybe… just maybe ring the same question in their minds.

Lean in; hear me whisper now, for we can only hope.